Author: Cris Bloomfield

Last night it snowed. This caused everyone to be really excited for about half and hour. Then they started complaining about how cold and wet it was.

Today the majority of the city’s pavements have been turned into ice rinks and everyone is complaining about how dangerous it is. God help us if we ever get a real winter in this country. Everything will probably grind to a halt, but even if that resulted in the a huge tragedy, I’m sure Teflon Tony would talk his way out of it. I mean he seems to get out of every other important situation by the skin of his teeth doesn’t he.

The very nice Mr. Andy Armstrong has relaunched the Singletrack Rogue’s Gallery. You can now put faces and real names to the pseudonyms here.

Finally Dirt Rag are asking for readers to comment on the editorial style and content of the esteemed US mountain bike magazine. Have your say over on their forum.

I had my first Cadbury’s Cream Egg of the year today, which means that Easter must be getting close. I ate it in one go. I’m sure I’ve read something, somewhere about how you eat a cream egg and what that says about you as a person. I know what it tells me, no messing, I was really hungry.

Hans Kellner has some interesting photos up on his site these days, he seems to have just been through a bit of a fungus phase. Fortunately these San Francisco sunsets more than make up for it, nice and beautiful.

Following up the news of Nico toasting his chances of a superb entry into this years World Rally Championship, MBUK has a report on his crash. I tell you, watch Nico, he’ll be back.

Now a few years ago, I remember seeing a Cannondale that had been specially made for Shaq O’Neill the American Basketball player, that like this one below, was one seriously big bike:

Titus Cycles’ Chris Cocalis showing that they cater for riders of all sizes.
More over at Mountain Bike Action.

What does third place in the Red Bull Rampage get you apart from glory and a loyal following of groupies? Well for Northern Irishman Glyn O’Brien, it gets you a sponsorship deal with Cove Bikes. More over at NSMB, although I bet Rob Warner would have something to say about their claim that he is the UKs leading freerider. But then Rob Warner wasn’t invited to the Red Bull Rampage was he…

No riding today, I have to get some work done. To catch up on what’s been happening over the last few days check out the archives.

Ten times Mountain Bike World Champion Nicolas Vouilloz now has a new ambition – to attempt to steal the thunder from the big names on the World Rally Championship circuit. And in typically Nico style he’s not doing things by halves. At the end of day one of arguably the most challenging event of the year and season opener, the Monte Carlo Rally, he was just over a minute behind the leader in 10th place.

Then in the first stage of day two:

The day got off to a shaky start however when Peugeot privateer Nicolas Vouilloz – running ahead of the works cars due to the regulation running order reversal – crashed his 206 WRC half way through the first stage, blocking the path of the oncoming cars.

Confusion reigned as some drivers posted times minutes slower than others. The organisers took the wise decision to annul the results for the cars affected by the accident. All drivers were given the time set by Ford privateer Antony Warmbold, the last man to get through the stage before Vouilloz.

You can be sure there’ll be more about Nico in months to come. More from the WRC here.

I’m going to claim this as an exclusive report, as I haven’t seen anything about this anywhere else. A 1200km Mountain bike race in Portugal sounds pretty cool to me. Full details about the race can be found on the event website, but this is a brief synopsis of what to expect:

SUPERTRAVESSIA

The ultimate endurance race, by GARMIN

After last year successful edition, this year the SuperTravessia Garmin is held from June 24 to July 4. Participants (in limited number) will ride 1200 km on a mountain bike, competing in the ultimate endurance race crossing all of Portugal , from the northeast border (Bragança) to the southwest most point of Portugal and Europe (Sagres). In between there will be 11 days of racing with a daily average vertical climb of 1937m. The length of each stage varies from 64 km (min) to 170 km (max).

In the SuperTravessia Garmin , participants are guided by the participant’s GPS receiver installed in his bike handlebar (the stages GPS tracks are daily uploaded by the organizer Ciclonatur), making orientation simple and intuitive and allowing an effective way of controlling the race. Having Garmin , one of the top brands in the GPS world, as the main sponsor of this event, makes it possible for participants to get a GPS receiver under unique conditions.

Prizes for the top finisher places include an Atlas titanium frame, a carbon Pace suspension fork and a Garmin GPS . Inscriptions are possible till May15 and there are three distinct packages (depending on the level of logistics contracted with the organizer). The entry fee starts at 300 €.

Meanwhile here in the UK the general consensus is that this coming week is going to pretty cold and there’s snow on the way. As they haven’t been able to forecast much accurately recently, we’ll have to wait and see.

This news on the future of what to many people is London’s most important cycling venue is just in from British Cycling:

BRITISH CYCLING AND EASTWAY GROUPS AGREE WAY FORWARD

At a meeting held in London on Friday 9 January 2004, British Cycling’s President, Brian Cookson, Chief Executive Peter King, and Facilities Officer Dave Cockram, met with 11 representatives of all the main user groups from the Eastway cycling facility in the Lee Valley Park. These included local BC officials, as well as representatives from local youth-based clubs, LVRC, TLI, London Cyclo-Cross Association, MTB representatives, plus BMX and Speedway which are not currently practised at Eastway.

Concerns had been expressed about the impact of the Olympic and Velopark plans and the disruption or reduction that would be caused to the existing road and off-road cycling facilities.

Under the chairmanship of Roy Gardiner of the Hainault Roads Club, the meeting heard from Peter King and Dave Cockram about the Lee Valley Regional Park Authority’s exciting plans for a multi-use Velopark, and how this fitted into the possible use of some of the site in connection with the London Olympic Bid.

Peter King confirmed that BC were working hard with the LVRPA to ensure that the funding would be in place both for the capital investment in site redesign and facilities construction and for the continuing running of them. He emphasized that a commitment to minimum disturbance during the construction of new facilities had been obtained from LVRPA due to the level of interest and commitment expressed by the cycling community. He confirmed that the LVRPA were fully behind cycling at Eastway.

Dave Cockram said that the proposed Velopark development would be the largest and most comprehensive cycling venue in the world and a great advertisement for cyclesport. He confirmed that the Velopark is being planned so that all users (road, MTB, BMX, speedway, track) could be there at the same time, and that all of the facilities are being planned currently to Olympic standard. As part of its development strategy, BC will use Eastway as its South East England base and would have its offices and staff for the region based there.

The representatives agreed to support the concept of the Velopark and the Olympic Bid, providing that:

.the existing road circuit was replaced by a similar or better facility, capable of adaptations to suit different users.

.the area of land available for off-road use remained the same with a variety of circuits of up to 3 miles in length possible.

.the new facilities were integrated in ways that did not cause conflict between users and were available before the existing facilities were removed from use.

.the integrity and safety of the cycling facilities were not compromised by any other uses, or changes to surrounding land uses.

The Eastway Group agreed to support wholeheartedly British Cycling in its efforts to secure this facility The group also agreed to meet again, and to set up working parties to draw up more detail on the specifications for the individual facilities, using both British Cycling’s Facilities Guide and local Eastway expertise.

BC President Brian Cookson said, “The meeting was both timely and useful for all concerned. I am very confident that, by working together with all the interest groups, we can ensure that the Velopark concept is successfully implemented to provide a new future for Eastway and a superb facility for London and the South East that will be the first of it’s kind in the world!”

Chair of the meeting Roy Gardiner said, “BC top officials coming to an Eastway Group meeting shows they mean business. Combining the national body’s standing and expertise with local knowledge will enable us together to achieve the finest possible cycling venue. Anywhere”. More >>>

Now Heli-biking has been growing in popularity as people have been pushing the limits of freeriding and downhilling. Now most people have been using the helicopter for shuttle runs up and down, but now some crazy guys are taking the concept developed from snow sports and are actually leaping out of the chopper before it lands. Mentalists. More over at nsmb.

helicopter jump

What else is happenin’? Well in case you didn’t know Raleigh are relaunching the infamous Chopper bike, this time sans the gear shifter on the crossbar. Will it be a success? Will it be a big seller? Seems that the response has been favourable, but with most buyers reportedly asking for the bikes to be kept boxed, there may not actually be that many seen out on the streets, which is kind of sad. What’s the point?

I wonder how many blokes in their thirties will buy one and realise that actually bike technology has moved on leaps and bound and that Choppers are in fact a stinking pile of crap and what they really want is a Rocky Mountain Switch…

A naked crusade through rural Britain by an ex-marine who now has an intimate knowledge of a number of prison cells has finally come to an end. More over at the beeb. They’ve also posted a report with the headline “Web Music Piracy Fight ‘Working'”, yeah right.

And this is the penguin game. Pick your target and swing.

There are a few big rides that I’ve read about recently that I wouldn’t mind having a crack at. The first is near to home and is a grand tour of the Peak District. Over 160 miles of it and a good proportion of that’s offroad. In a day anyone?

The second is a Transalp epic from Chamonix to Zermatt, in a slight more realistic seven days. I’d definitely be up for that too. Along the route of the Grand Raid Cristalp in places and if I survived until the final day of the ride I’d be into familiar territory. There’s details of more great Holidays from Ride the Alps here.

There are currently discussions underway within Westminister over whether or not people should be made to wear lids when out riding. I think the view on this has been quite well summed up by Steve M: “If they’re not prepared to look after themselves, I don’t want the responsibility of looking after them.”

It’s a fair point if you can’t be arsed to take a basic step to save your life, why should you expect someone to look after you if you have a serious off. It’s just intelligent thinking if you’re out with other riders. I do think that it’s a personal choice however, but big brother might have different ideas. This is the British Cycling position:

“British Cycling considers that hard shell helmets are a necessity in all events run under our technical regulations. British Cycling recommends the use of these helmets for leisure riding but recognises the right of each individual to chose whether or not to accept this recommendation.”

The Sexmidget test rode the shop Stumpy FSR recently. As it’s too small for me you’ll have to take his word for it on the performance. The review is here.

It’s been nearly a week since I’ve had a chance to update. Last weeks Thursday night ride didn’t happen, my t’internet connection has been down and there’s been a fair bit else going on, the highlight of which was a trip north of the border that started on Saturday night.

Ben and I loaded up our bikes and gear and headed up to the Glentress Hotel near Peebles and made it in time for a reasonable session at the resident’s bar. The next day after negotiating the ice rink that had formed on the tarmac, it was time to ride up to the Hub in the Forest, allowing Ben to suss out the bike shop and then it was time to hit the black run.

Lots of climbing, great singletrack, mud, ice and lots of snow. I haven’t been snow biking in ages, but when there’s several feet of it in places, that’s a whole new world of riding. Photos are up here.

Here are some fantastic photos to remind you that the days are getting longer again and it’ll soon be summer. Mountains, epic rides in the sun and dusty trails. Roll on the goodtimes. There’s a loads of photos in these two galleries from the Alps courtesy of Bikeverbier. For those looking for some different scenery and some US orientated shots, take a look at these photo galleries from Dave Wright.

Here’s a selection of my favourites from Verbier:

Many thanks to Polly Hall for posting up the link to those photos, she’s been out there in the past and last time met up with the rather stunning Swiss downhiller Sari Jorgenson. Mmm, more here.

One of the banes of internet usage is eventually someone somewhere adds you to a mailing list after which the floodgates of junk mail are released. Unfortunately I’m in a job where I need to check e-mails which say things like ‘strictly confidential’ or ‘please help’ before I delete them.

Now I know I’m not alone in this and in the past people like Big Jonny have replied to fraudsters looking to con the unsuspecting out of hard earned cash with satire-laden responses, often with amusing results.

I actually once reported an account to the email provider, but I hate being made to jump through hoops and reporting inevitably means filling out on-line complaint forms. Fuck that. I’m not going to be doing that any more.

So just this once, I thought it would be interesting to dialectize a ‘cry for assistance’ into a more entertaining format:

STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL

I’m bloody well Mr. Delboy Johnson, Bank Manager of the Lagos Branch of the Orient Bank of Nigeria, right. I ‘ave urgent and right confidential business proposition for yer.

On November 1998, right, my client and a national of yor country ‘oo were a consultant/contractor wiv the bloody Nigerian National Petroleum Corporation (NNPC), deposited for twelve calendar monffs, right, US$25,000,000.00 in me branch. Upon maturity, I sent a routine notification ter his forwardin’ address but got no reply, init?

After a monff, right, we sent a reminder and finally we discovered from ‘is contract employers, that me customer died from an automobile accident. On furffer investigation, right, I found out that ‘e did not leave a will and all attempts to trace ‘is next of kin were fruitless.

I therefore made furffer investigations and discovered that me late customer did not declare any next of kin in any of ‘is official documents, includin’ ‘is Bank Deposit paperwork. This sum of US$25,000,000.00 is still sittin’ in the Bank and the interest is bein’ rolled over wiv the principal sum at the end of each year. No bloke ‘as come forward ter claim it.

Accordin’ to the bloomin’ Nigerian Lor and in accordance wiv the bankin’ rule, at the expiration of 5 years, the brass will revert ter the ownership of the Nigerian Government if no bloke applies ter claim the funds. Consequently, i decided ter trace ‘is last name over the internet and i came across yor name. You have the same last name wiv me late client. That is why i have contacted yer ter be the next of kin ter my late client and assist me in securin’ the fund, so that the bleedin’ fruits of this ole man´s labor will not cop into the hands of some corrupt officials.

So this is simple, I will like yer ter provide me immediately wiv yor full names, address and dog and bone and fax numbers so that an attorney will prepare the necessary documents and affidavits, wich will put yer in place as the bloody next of kin. I’ll get out me spoons. We will employ the services of a well reputable attorney for draftin’ and notarization of the will and obtain the necessary documents and letter of probate/administration in yor favor the transfer.

A bank account in any part of the world, right, wich yer provide, will then facilitate the bloody transfer of this brass ter yer as the beneficiary/next of kin. The brass will be paid into yor account for us ter share in the ratio of 60% for me and 40% for yer. There is no risk at all as all the bloomin’ paperwork for this transaction will be done by the attorney and me position as the Branch Manager guarantees the successful execution of this transaction.

If yer are interested, right, please reply immediately via me private email address below. Upon yor response, right, I shall then provide yer wiv more details and relevant documents that will ‘elp yer understand evry fin’ and on ‘ow to realise this particular fund soonest. Please observe wiv utmost confidentiality, and rest assured that this transaction would be most profitable for boff of us because I shall require yor assistance ter invest my share in yor country. Awaitin’ yor urgent reply .

Mae West regards, Delboy.

There hasn’t been a doping scandal in the cycling world for some time which might lead you to think that the drugs problem has disappeared. The French authorities however seem to have a different idea. More on that and the future of riders from the demoted teams Kelme and Domina Vacanze over at Velo News.

Pink Bike seem to have the first news of the story that SRAM look set to buy brake manufacturer Avid. Avid make some great kit and it’s going to be really interesting to see what SRAM can come up with as an alternative to Shimano kit. Read the full article here.

If there was any doubt that Enduro racing is the current big thing in mountain biking the following two links should change that perspective. Merida have taken over the reins held by Kona and have details of some epic riding coming up this year in Wales and a new 12 hour event, this time on the west coast. Meanwhile Singletrack are behind the British Cycling backed race series.

US firm Risse Racing have never gone away, it’s just that they don’t have such a big presence in the UK compared to some of the other shock manufacturers. The thing that surprised me is that they also do a range of replacement parts for bikes a la BETD, including this range of parts of Specialized bikes.

The Sexmidget has had a revelation (which you’ll need to read if what follows is to make sense) and has announced somewhat tongue in cheek that he’s going to stop smoking gear and getting pissed on beer and is going to take racing really seriously. Which is going to mean a start to training and slipping into some roady lycra.

Most fundamentally important he’s also developed a new philosophical epistemology, henceforth known as Postsinglespeedism and is encouraging the enlightened to loudly proclaim riser bars and anything but xc racing tyres as “shit and for gay wankers all the fucking time”.

I don’t know what the most worrying prospect is, but the ‘midget is obviously a genius.

After a lazy start to the day I managed to get my act together and made my way up to the West Ridings for a day in Last of the Summer Wine countryside. I parked up in Penistone and dropped down and then climbed up past Scout Dike Reservoir, from there I headed around to Gunthwaite Hall before tackling Heald Head and its two ford crossings and the woodland above Bentcliff Hall before dropping into Cawthorne.

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From the trail leading across towards Barnby Furnace, the sight of the M1 and Barnsley remind you that you’re not far from built up areas. The Silkstone Trail, a former waggonway, leads up to Silkstone, from where there seems to be a huge amount of climbing up past Blacke Dam for which you never seem to earn back.

The Transpennine Trail is joined just after the Railway bridge adjacent to Coates Great Wood and heads off towards Hull along a disused railway line. After a brief section on the A629, the route drops down over the spectacular Willow Bridge over the River Don. From there a bridleway trail crosses land heading towards Roughbirchworth, but is a section characterised by a staggering number of farm gates. It soon forgotten though as the trail drops back into Penistone.

_ _ _ _

Not a particularly big route, but one that was probably ideal for a winter ride in wet and muddy conditions. It’s given me a taste of sections of the Transpennine Trail that I hadn’t ridden before and it’s again raised the prospect of riding the whole route, one day. For now I’m happy to read other peoples accounts.