Month: January 2007

Slack

Not posted for a while, which does mean I have the advantage of a whole heap of things to post that have accumulated in my inbox. Remember all those TV shows you enjoyed at the time and then forgot all about? Well it looks like someone has taken the time to actually compile a fairly comprehensive summary of them all. Check out Retrojunk for your reminder of Street Hawk, Manimal and Airwolf and just how dated they are now – they’ve even managed to find Tales of the Golden Monkey. Ace!

From: Tyrrell
Subject: These are pretty funny
HOW MEN AND WOMEN DIFFER

NICKNAMES
* If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
* If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT
* When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in R50, even though it’s only for R115.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
* When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY
* A man will pay R2 for a R1 item he needs.
* A woman will pay R1 for a R2 item that she doesn’t need but it’s on sale

BATHROOMS
* A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from Dischem.
* The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS
* A woman has the last word in any argument.
* Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

CATS
* Women love cats.
* Men say they love cats, but when women aren’t looking, men kick cats.

FUTURE
* A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
* A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS
* A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
* A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE
* A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
* A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but she does.

DRESSING UP
* A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the bins, answer the phone, read a book, and get the post.
* A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL
* Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
* Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING
* Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret-fears and hopes and dreams.
* A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
* Any married man should forget his mistakes. There’s no use in two people remembering the same thing.

* What a woman says: C’mon…This place is a mess. You and I need to clean. Your trousers are on the floor and you’ll have no clothes if we don’t do the laundry now.
* What a man hears: C’MON … blah, blah, blah YOU AND I blah, blah, blah, blah, blah ON THE FLOOR blah, blah, blah, NO CLOTHES blah, blah, blah, blah, NOW

Can you relate to any of that?

From: Catia
Subject: Mailbox

Why don’t you get a postbox like this?

Mailbox

Oh and that little race in South Africa? Well things are getting a little hot in the Port Elizabeth area. Tyrrell says this news report is talking about the shopping Mall he used to go to all the time.

Best of You Tube

There’s lots of stuff on you tube including a few biking videos. This one is particularly interesting if you stick it out to the end, because in all honesty the beginning is quite dull.

This one’s for Jed and Tyrrell. A bunch of guys down at the rifle range with a .577 T-Rex rifle, which it seems has quite a kick. Watch these people make fools of themselves trying to shoot it. Remember even Commandos need to pick their LZs carefully. Sarge! We’re pinned down and we can’t move!

For the followers of world politics, remember George W Bush was accepted into Yale University, where he received a Bachelor of Arts degree in history in 1968. Here’s a video montage of the president of the most powerful country in the world in action.

Finally Travis Pastrana is one crazy mo’fo. That’s a double back flip off a kicker on his second run on a motocross bike. Skills to pay the bills for sure.

Dave Goes For a Swim

Met up with Neil and Lardy again this morning an Neil’s mate Dave who lives just down the road from me was out for a ride too. Out of Marple and over to the Goyt Valley for a five hour ride in the hills with well over 1,100m of climbing.

Approaching the Errwood Reservoir

It was a great day out with clear blue skies and a chilly start disappeared as we warmed up. After a hearty lunch outside the Beehive Inn, we headed up and over to Whaley Bridge and then motorwayed it along the canal back to Marple.

Unfortunately for Dave, he was riding a bit close behind me and wasn’t really on the ball. Head down an focused he clipped a branch on the towpath and went for a brief and cold swim in the canal. Brrrr. Time to up it a couple of gears and get home quick.

Trees Don’t Move

Today was the first proper ride of the year. The daily commute into work just doesn’t cut it as a proper ride. It’s just a fairly monotonous and dull route into work that is only made more interesting by the attempts of motorists to add another kill marking to the wing of their car. This weeks special was an elderly chinese woman driving a Skoda saloon whose inability to hold her line on a round about almost but me into the Armco.

Near Jackson's Boat, Sale

The plan was to meet up with Tyrrell and ride the river run out past Reddish Vale and then to stop of at the Jodhpur Café for a brew and a bacon and mushroom sandwich before riding home. It was decided that 10am was a fair time to meet so, this morning I left home about 9.30am and span over to our meeting spot near Jackson’s Boat on the banks of the Mersey.

After waiting for half an hour it was clear that some fate had befallen my riding partner and today was going to be a solo run. The river run is to the uninitiated a fairly uninteresting route. Over the last five or six years improvement by the local councils have only served to eliminate any of the interesting bits of singletrack by making them into ‘proper’ trails or by passing them altogether and them falling into disrepair. It’s an undeniably flat for the majority of it’s length, although there are a few little rises over spurs in the river valley if you venture up and off the rivers double levees.

It was on today’s ride over one of these small rises that I managed to run over a dog. Not some little terrier, but a full on sheepdog. The owners were it seems just about to launch a tennis ball for it and in anticipation the canine was belting it full tilt down the trail looking behind it to identify the moment of launch. Unfortunately the hurtling hound found itself to be wedged under the front wheel of the singlespeed seconds later and was obviously completely startled by the whole thing. A brief chat with the owners followed in which we joked about the whole thing after checking out the dog was okay. It certainly seemed to have learned its lesson as on the way back it cowered behind the walkers as I went past.

Shortly after this there is a break in the riverbank where there is a concrete structure that houses an automated hydraulic sluice gate. This is opened during bank full conditions to flood a designated area of wasteland and golf courses to prevent flooding down stream. During the summer this is generally dry and dusty and you can whiz down it through the bottom and with enough speed going in you can generally pop a bit of air off the top on the way out.

After scoping it out from above, I anticipated that it might be a bit wet and in the past it has generally been a bit sketchy after rain so I went in reasonably quick, but not at a warp factor that would be launching me skyward on exit. Big mistake. The floor of the channel was covered in well over a foot of alluvial mud and as my front wheel rapidly disappeared into the mire I began to panic, for as the hub went under I knew what was coming next. Air time, but of the unwanted kind. Over the bars and smack down into the mud. Boy did that stuff smell. Euurrgh.

Someone picked the right line. It wasn't me.

So I carried on and went as far as Ye Olde Woolpack in Stockport. It seems Smith Knight Fay have relocated their Stockport Dealership, so caked in mud and armed with the Indy Fab I went over to scout it out. Sure enough they had the new S3 in stock, a pretty mean looking black thing. All it needed was the bucket seats…
Having received some funny looks from the staff I took the hint and headed home. The rear tyre had picked up a puncture, but it was slow enough just to have generated that slight bobbing sensation you get as the tyre starts to soften and then squirm around the corners. Given the amount of drift debris on the river banks the puncture wasn’t really unexpected, but feeling cold by this point I decided that I would just pump it up and change it at home later.

After crossing the Cheadle Road and passing the health club, there is a small section of woodland. A ribbon of singletrack runs through this parallel to the more recent pushchair buggy trail and in my mind it’s a must. There are a few fallen trees along it that you have to duck under, one of which is particularly low and a real limbo job. I’d failed to clean it on the way out and was determined to give it ago on the way back.

Check the speed. Check the angle of approach to get maximum headroom. Off the saddle crouched down to one side of the bike as low as I can go. Entry. We’re through…Yay…Whhhoooaaa….WTF?….Oooommmph. Down like a sack of spuds. That’ll be mistake number too then. Seems the backpack caught on the tree and flipped me off the back of the bike and hit me down flat on my back like some wrestling move. Damn I really should learn. Trees don’t move.

Gonna’ Work It Out

Been updating the racing pages recently. Tyrrell and I are Circuit Training twice a week now and we chatted to one of our colleagues who was taking the class today and she convinced us to come and try the Monday weights session too. We’re going to get fit for this race in South Africa and that is for sure. Talking of which it seems last years race wan’t all sunshine…

Cape Epic gets Wet

From the 2006 Cape Epic Race race.

The Route

From Knysna to Lourensford. Total distance: 886km. Total ascent: 15045m
Stage 1: Knysna – Uniondale

Distance: 101km

Ascent: 2660m
The Jewel of the Garden Route, Knysna, once again hosts the start of the Absa Cape Epic, with the route heading out on familiar roads into the lush indigenous forest for the first 50km. Riders then experience the first new element of the 2007 route heading north instead of west at this point. Hilly open-road riding replaces the cool cover of the forest with no shelter from the elements. The major obstacle for the day will be the 12km climb over Prince Alfred’s pass – complete with a gut-wrenching false crest two kilometres short of the real thing – and then it is into the heat of the Klein Karoo, finishing over a rocky historic Wagon Trail into the town of Uniondale.

Stage 2: Uniondale – Oudtshoorn

Distance: 132km

Ascent: 2245m
The start out of Uniondale is gentle, a rolling affair on open roads as the Absa Cape Epic follows the Kamanassie River. For some forty kilometres, riders will enjoy the scenery of this spectacular area, before turning right and begining their assault on the Kamanassie Nature Reserve. 35km of back-breaking off-road riding follows, starting with a twelve kilometre rocky jeep track with over 800m climbing at an average of 6.6%. After a treacherously lose rocky descent, the final 50-odd km into Oudtshoorn will be fast and fun, and if the wind is favorable it will push the riders all the way home after the 2007 Absa Cape Epic’s longest day.


Stage 3: Oudtshoorn – Ladismith

Distance: 128km

Ascent: 2425m
Oudtshoorn bids the riders of the Absa Cape Epic farewell, and almost immediately they are faced with fast jeep track through arid, ostrich-filled plains, a mild start to the toughest climbing day of the 2007 event. The speedy start grinds to a crawl after 40km at Fielie’s Folly where riders climb 430m at an average 14%! The good news is that there is a fun, fast, open descent on the other side and almost 30km of recovery time before the Calitzdorp Crusher looms, offering another 3km of brutal stony jeep track, before the riders descend to the foot of the Huis Rivier pass. 8km of grind upwards on the tar later, the route turns onto pleasant jeep tracks through picturesque apple orchards, followed by 30km of rolling open graded gravel roads into the finish at Ladismith.

Stage 4: Ladismith – Barrydale

Distance: 121km

Ascent: 1285m
After arguably the hardest start to the Absa Cape Epic ever, day four is a relatively easier rest day, but still holds its own challenges. The roll out of Ladismith is on tar for 6km, before the riders turn right and head onto farm roads of the area. Wide open roads, short climbs and a few technical obstacles will give the Epic entrants time to regroup and recuperate, before entering the Leopard Rock game reserve, where sandy jeep tracks and perplexed wildlife await. Then it is onto more rocky terrain for the final 25km into Barrydale.

Stage 5: Barrydale – Montagu

Distance: 102km

Ascent: 1590m
The route out of Barrydale promises to be spectacular with the first 40km crisscrossing the scenic farms in the valley, before the riders of the Absa Cape Epic are asked to find their climbing legs once more as they head up a challenging 5km singletrack climb to the top of the Op De Tradouw pass. From this summit, all roads point down until the race enters the moonscape valley leading to the Wolfieskop Pass, which climbs 430m in 7km, before sending riders on a helter skelter ride down the other side on the best descent of the 2007 route. The roll into Montagu is fast and not too taxing and the welcome will be warm.

Stage 6: Montagu – Villiersdorp

Distance: 111km

Ascent: 1565m
After a blistering 5km tar start through Cogmanskloof, the race leaves Montagu and heads into the farmlands of the lush Robertson valley, be warned the rolling hills and fun descents are riddled with thorns, so riders best come prepared! Exiting the farmland, the riders have a scenic 25km tar section before heading up the day’s big challenge, a 6km hike-a-bike section riders will remember from the 2005 Epic, followed by open roads and fast descents all the way to the foot of Rooihoogte. Locals beware: in true Epic tradition the route does not take the easy way along the tar road to the finish in Villiersdorp, but a more tortuous route to the radio mast above the town, before descending for a good night’s rest.

Stage 7: Villiersdorp – Kleinmond

Distance: 116km

Ascent: 1990m
Leaving Villiersdorp on the Absa Cape Epic can only mean one thing: a visit to one of its favourite sons, Groenlandberg. The good news for 2007 is that the riders in the Epic will only face about two thirds of this monster climb before turning left and enjoying a long stretch of rolling jeep track through natural fynbos. A gradual climb takes the riders up and over the mountain before they get to enjoy a roller coaster descent into the Lebanon forest area where fire roads and cool shady forests await. After this all-too-short forest section, a quick dip under the N2 and soon you will be rewarded with panoramic ocean views before descending into the sleepy coastal town of Kleinmond.
Stage 8: Kleinmond – Lourensford

Distance: 75km

Ascent: 1285m
The final day of the 2007 Absa Cape Epic starts from Kleinmond crossing the Palmiet River on a short and fast tar start, before turning right into the Kogelberg nature reserve riding alongside the Palmiet river on jeep track up and over the mountain, riders pass through the apple orchards of Elgin and Grabouw as the route works its way to the summit of Sir Lowry pass. Here, riders will be forced to portage their bikes for about a kilometre down slippery rocks that still bear the marks of the Voortrekker wagon wheels, not for their safety, but because the Gamtou pass is a national heritage site and special permission has been given for the first time to descend this historic track. After dropping onto the railway line for a fun, bumpy few kilometres, it’s into the magnificent Lourensford Wine Estate for the all-new Absa Cape Epic finish, where riders will collect their medals, and return, for a year, to a life outside the Absa Cape Epic.

The Towns

Garden Route

Knysna – South Africa’s favourite town
Registration and Race Start: 23 – 24 March 2007
Last Year Visited: 2006
Number of Previous Visits: 3

Welcome to Knysna, the first stage of the Absa Cape Epic! This location is a perfect starting point for the race with its striking scenery, serene beaches and flourishing Knysna Forest, which is the largest indigenous forest in South Africa. Be prepared to ride alongside small antelope, a wealth of colourful birds and maybe even the Knysna elephant that still roam wild in the forest. This vibrant town is alive with outdoor enthusiasts and is regarded the mountain biking Mecca of South Africa. Knysna town is famous for its delicious oysters and maintains its colourful diversity through its unique coffee shops, restaurants and craft shops. Try to catch a glimpse of the colorful Knysna Loerie while riding through this charming seaside village.

Official Website : www.visitknysna.com
Tourism Info : knysna.tourism@pixie.co.za or +27 (0)44 382 5510
Accommodation booking : booking@mweb.co.za or +27 (0)44 382 6960

Uniondale – Uniting our people through tourism
Stage location 1 – 24 March 2007
Last Year Visited: –
Number of Previous Visits: 0

This mountain paradise is situated between the Baviaanskloof, Langkloof and Kammanassie mountain ranges and provides an unspoiled gateway to these areas. Follow the awe-inspiring Prince Alfred’s Pass through indigenous forest and past waterfalls cascading into crystal clear rock pools. The pass was designed and built by Thomas Baines and still has the original hand packed stone retaining walls. At the top of the pass you reach the Langkloof area at Avontuur well know for growing export quality apples. A ride through the scenic Uniondale poort with magnificent rock formations and ancient San rock art will bring you to the quaint Klein Karoo town of Uniondale. Through the efforts of a group of committed Uniondale townsfolk, who are prepared to put shoulder to the wheel, they are managing to turn the tide of change and unite all their people. Celebrate this diversity, enjoy and experience their unique country hospitality, quaint restored buildings and local arts and crafts.

Official Website : www.uniondale.co.za
Tourism Info : tourism@uniondale.co.za
Accommodation booking : tourism@uniondale.co.za or +27 (0)44 752 1266

Oudtshoorn – Big bird country
Stage location 2 – 25 March 2007
Last Year Visited: –
Number of Previous Visits: 0

Oudtshoorn is the Ostrich capital of the World and home to the spectacular Cango Caves. The town is the commercial hub of the great Klein Karoo region and is situated in a beautiful wide valley between the Outeniqua and Swartberg Mountains. Besides mountain biking the surrounding area offers many outdoor attractions including hiking trails, caving, abseiling, rock climbing, quad biking, hot air ballooning, eco tours, driving across historical passes, birding, to mention but a few. Oudtshoorn now also offers unique bush safaris experiences and game viewing at a number of up-market game lodges situated just outside the town.

Official Website : www.oudtshoorn.com
Tourism Info : www.oudtshoorninfo.com or +27 (0)44 279 2532
Accommodation booking : www.oudtshoorninfo.com +27 (0)44 279 2532

Ladismith – “Lady” of the Klein Karoo
Stage location 3 : 26 March 2007
Last Year Visited: –
Number of previous visits: 0

Ladismith, is situated at the foot of the Klein Swartberg mountain range, with the split peaked Towerkop looming above the town. It lies in the very core of an area housing all three biodiversity “hotspots” in South Africa (Fynbos, Succulent Karoo and Subtropical thicket biomes). This picturesque town boasts a variety of architectural styles and is the centre for a prosperous farming community. Its unpolluted air, blue skies at day and bright stars at night will ensure a well-deserved rest after the grueling stage from Oudtshoorn.

Official Website : www.ladismith.org.za
Tourism Info : visit@ladismith.org.za or +27 (0)28 551 1378
Accommodation booking : visit@ladismith.org.za or +27 (0)28 551 1378

Barrydale – An artistic community
Stage location 4 : 27 March 2007
Last year visited: 2005
Number of Previous Visits: 2

We would like you to have lasting memories of your Barrydale experience – perhaps an unforgettable hike into the surrounding mountains, or a drive into the awe-inspiring Tradouw Pass, or after a stroll around the village to see the wonderful gardens, sitting outside at sunset listening to the calls of the Hadeda Ibis as they return to their roots, and admiring the view of the surrounding hills – possibly accompanied by a glass of one of the excellent local wines. As a refuge from our increasingly strident urban life, Barrydale’s peace is bound to restore your spirits.

Official Website : www.barrydale.co.za
Tourism Info : info@barrydale.co.za or +27 (0) 28 572 1572
Accommodation booking : info@barrydale.co.za or +27 (0) 28 572 1572

Montagu – Oasis of the Western Cape
Stage location 5: 28 March 2007
Last year visited: 2005
Number of Previous Visits: 1

A hearty welcome to Montagu – SA’s favourite Village, stage location winner of the 2005 Absa Cape Epic and the Jewel of the Klein Karoo! With superb mountain scenery, fresh Karoo air, friendly atmosphere and perfectly situated halfway between Cape Town and the Garden Route, Montagu is ideal for a breakaway. Together with their famous hot springs and tractor rides, Montagu offers many outdoor activities including rock-climbing, mountain biking, 4X4, fishing, kloofing, plus history, art and culture. Not to mention our splendid wines and food! Relax and enjoy great Karoo hospitality!

Official Website : www.tourismmontagu.co.za
Tourism Info : manager@montagu-ashton.info or +27 (0)23 614 2471
Accommodation booking : info@montagu-ashton.info or +27 (0)23-614 2471

Villiersdorp – A tranquil town
Stage location 6: 29 March 2007
Last year visited: 2005
Number of Previous Visits: 1

Villiersdorp is known as the Pearl of the Overberg. It nestles in a rich valley surrounded by lush farmlands, spectacular mountains and the magnificent Theewaterskloof Dam. The 9-hole golf course is situated next to the dam, while on the water one can enjoy pleasure cruises, fishing and most other water sports.

Villiersdorp also offers tractor tours, camping, B&B and self-catering facilities, restaurants, and wine tasting. For the more adventurous, there are wonderful 4×4 routes and hiking trails in the surrounding Blokkop, Aasvoël and Sneeukop Mountains. The town was established in 1843 by field-cornet Peter de Villiers and when a request was made to the Governor of the Cape for a name to keep the French origin, he called it De Villiers Dorp..

Official Website : www.overberg.co.za
Tourism Info : no Tourism Office
Accommodation booking : no Tourism Office

Kleinmond – Where the whales play and wild flowers bloom
Stage location 7: 30 March 2007
Last year visited: –
Number of Previous Visits: 0

Nestling in this unique area of Hanglip-Kleinmond lie the towns of Rooiels -where you can catch the sun setting over False Bay while enjoying “sundowners”, Pringle Bay – which hosts a Craft Market the first Saturday morning of each month and where you can bodysurf at the beach before feasting on fresh fish or joining the locals for a drink and Betty’s Bay where you can go and visit the penguin colony around sunset. With visiting and inhabiting this Biosphere area come responsibilities and the principles of sustained development are followed, while still offering a host of adventures as well as relaxing holidays.

Official Website : www.kleinmond.com
Tourism Info : www.ecoscape.org.za
Accommodation booking : info@ecoscape.org.za or +27 (0)28 271 5657

Lourensford Wine Estate
Stage 8: Race Finish 31 March 2007
Last year visited: –
Number of Previous Visits: 0

Lourensford, established in the year 1700 is arguably one of the most beautiful wine estates in the world. Steeped in history and heritage, the estate also boasts an ultra-modern winery utilising technology unique in the Southern Hemisphere. The magnificent soils and diverse microclimates create the ideal terroir (a sense of place) for world-beating wines. Lourensford is fast becoming one of the biggest wine estates in South Africa, with over 300 hectares of vines already planted.

Lourensford’s scenic splendor has made it a popular location for many local and international film shoots, starring some of Hollywood’s top actors. The estate hosts annual sporting and cultural events with thousands of participants and spectators, it’s also a sought after venue for wedding receptions and corporate functions. There’s a sizeable equestrian establishment on the estate, with stabling as well as one of the only two polo fields in Cape Town, it is here that the sport of kings is practiced and enjoyed.

Official Website : www.lourensford.co.za
Tourism Info : www.somersetwest.com
Accommodation booking : +27 (0)21 851 4022

Training

Circuit training today at lunchtime at the University’s Sugden Centre was a good workout. Tyrrell and I are back their on Friday for another session and then we’re riding both days this weekend. Circuits twice a week for the remainder of the build up to the race should helps us boost our base level fitness ahead of the race. Gilly and Keeks are flying out to South Africa this week to prepare the ground so to speak, leaving us to focus on getting fit for the race.

Bingo!

Went and played “Big Screen Bingo” on Tuesday night at the Trafford Centre’s Odeon. It was a pilot for a system setup by Blue Dog Inc. I must admit that I wasn’t too enthusiastic about the suggestion to go, but in retrospect it tunred out to be a great night out and fairly good entertainment. In honesty I have to say scooping £100 in prizes including the only full house of the night was an added bonus and may have gone some way to the ‘that was good’ view on things. I’d definitely go again.