Category: Words

Now Heli-biking has been growing in popularity as people have been pushing the limits of freeriding and downhilling. Now most people have been using the helicopter for shuttle runs up and down, but now some crazy guys are taking the concept developed from snow sports and are actually leaping out of the chopper before it lands. Mentalists. More over at nsmb.

helicopter jump

What else is happenin’? Well in case you didn’t know Raleigh are relaunching the infamous Chopper bike, this time sans the gear shifter on the crossbar. Will it be a success? Will it be a big seller? Seems that the response has been favourable, but with most buyers reportedly asking for the bikes to be kept boxed, there may not actually be that many seen out on the streets, which is kind of sad. What’s the point?

I wonder how many blokes in their thirties will buy one and realise that actually bike technology has moved on leaps and bound and that Choppers are in fact a stinking pile of crap and what they really want is a Rocky Mountain Switch…

A naked crusade through rural Britain by an ex-marine who now has an intimate knowledge of a number of prison cells has finally come to an end. More over at the beeb. They’ve also posted a report with the headline “Web Music Piracy Fight ‘Working'”, yeah right.

And this is the penguin game. Pick your target and swing.

There are a few big rides that I’ve read about recently that I wouldn’t mind having a crack at. The first is near to home and is a grand tour of the Peak District. Over 160 miles of it and a good proportion of that’s offroad. In a day anyone?

The second is a Transalp epic from Chamonix to Zermatt, in a slight more realistic seven days. I’d definitely be up for that too. Along the route of the Grand Raid Cristalp in places and if I survived until the final day of the ride I’d be into familiar territory. There’s details of more great Holidays from Ride the Alps here.

There are currently discussions underway within Westminister over whether or not people should be made to wear lids when out riding. I think the view on this has been quite well summed up by Steve M: “If they’re not prepared to look after themselves, I don’t want the responsibility of looking after them.”

It’s a fair point if you can’t be arsed to take a basic step to save your life, why should you expect someone to look after you if you have a serious off. It’s just intelligent thinking if you’re out with other riders. I do think that it’s a personal choice however, but big brother might have different ideas. This is the British Cycling position:

“British Cycling considers that hard shell helmets are a necessity in all events run under our technical regulations. British Cycling recommends the use of these helmets for leisure riding but recognises the right of each individual to chose whether or not to accept this recommendation.”

The Sexmidget test rode the shop Stumpy FSR recently. As it’s too small for me you’ll have to take his word for it on the performance. The review is here.

It’s been nearly a week since I’ve had a chance to update. Last weeks Thursday night ride didn’t happen, my t’internet connection has been down and there’s been a fair bit else going on, the highlight of which was a trip north of the border that started on Saturday night.

Ben and I loaded up our bikes and gear and headed up to the Glentress Hotel near Peebles and made it in time for a reasonable session at the resident’s bar. The next day after negotiating the ice rink that had formed on the tarmac, it was time to ride up to the Hub in the Forest, allowing Ben to suss out the bike shop and then it was time to hit the black run.

Lots of climbing, great singletrack, mud, ice and lots of snow. I haven’t been snow biking in ages, but when there’s several feet of it in places, that’s a whole new world of riding. Photos are up here.

Here are some fantastic photos to remind you that the days are getting longer again and it’ll soon be summer. Mountains, epic rides in the sun and dusty trails. Roll on the goodtimes. There’s a loads of photos in these two galleries from the Alps courtesy of Bikeverbier. For those looking for some different scenery and some US orientated shots, take a look at these photo galleries from Dave Wright.

Here’s a selection of my favourites from Verbier:

Many thanks to Polly Hall for posting up the link to those photos, she’s been out there in the past and last time met up with the rather stunning Swiss downhiller Sari Jorgenson. Mmm, more here.

One of the banes of internet usage is eventually someone somewhere adds you to a mailing list after which the floodgates of junk mail are released. Unfortunately I’m in a job where I need to check e-mails which say things like ‘strictly confidential’ or ‘please help’ before I delete them.

Now I know I’m not alone in this and in the past people like Big Jonny have replied to fraudsters looking to con the unsuspecting out of hard earned cash with satire-laden responses, often with amusing results.

I actually once reported an account to the email provider, but I hate being made to jump through hoops and reporting inevitably means filling out on-line complaint forms. Fuck that. I’m not going to be doing that any more.

So just this once, I thought it would be interesting to dialectize a ‘cry for assistance’ into a more entertaining format:

STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL

I’m bloody well Mr. Delboy Johnson, Bank Manager of the Lagos Branch of the Orient Bank of Nigeria, right. I ‘ave urgent and right confidential business proposition for yer.

On November 1998, right, my client and a national of yor country ‘oo were a consultant/contractor wiv the bloody Nigerian National Petroleum Corporation (NNPC), deposited for twelve calendar monffs, right, US$25,000,000.00 in me branch. Upon maturity, I sent a routine notification ter his forwardin’ address but got no reply, init?

After a monff, right, we sent a reminder and finally we discovered from ‘is contract employers, that me customer died from an automobile accident. On furffer investigation, right, I found out that ‘e did not leave a will and all attempts to trace ‘is next of kin were fruitless.

I therefore made furffer investigations and discovered that me late customer did not declare any next of kin in any of ‘is official documents, includin’ ‘is Bank Deposit paperwork. This sum of US$25,000,000.00 is still sittin’ in the Bank and the interest is bein’ rolled over wiv the principal sum at the end of each year. No bloke ‘as come forward ter claim it.

Accordin’ to the bloomin’ Nigerian Lor and in accordance wiv the bankin’ rule, at the expiration of 5 years, the brass will revert ter the ownership of the Nigerian Government if no bloke applies ter claim the funds. Consequently, i decided ter trace ‘is last name over the internet and i came across yor name. You have the same last name wiv me late client. That is why i have contacted yer ter be the next of kin ter my late client and assist me in securin’ the fund, so that the bleedin’ fruits of this ole man´s labor will not cop into the hands of some corrupt officials.

So this is simple, I will like yer ter provide me immediately wiv yor full names, address and dog and bone and fax numbers so that an attorney will prepare the necessary documents and affidavits, wich will put yer in place as the bloody next of kin. I’ll get out me spoons. We will employ the services of a well reputable attorney for draftin’ and notarization of the will and obtain the necessary documents and letter of probate/administration in yor favor the transfer.

A bank account in any part of the world, right, wich yer provide, will then facilitate the bloody transfer of this brass ter yer as the beneficiary/next of kin. The brass will be paid into yor account for us ter share in the ratio of 60% for me and 40% for yer. There is no risk at all as all the bloomin’ paperwork for this transaction will be done by the attorney and me position as the Branch Manager guarantees the successful execution of this transaction.

If yer are interested, right, please reply immediately via me private email address below. Upon yor response, right, I shall then provide yer wiv more details and relevant documents that will ‘elp yer understand evry fin’ and on ‘ow to realise this particular fund soonest. Please observe wiv utmost confidentiality, and rest assured that this transaction would be most profitable for boff of us because I shall require yor assistance ter invest my share in yor country. Awaitin’ yor urgent reply .

Mae West regards, Delboy.

There hasn’t been a doping scandal in the cycling world for some time which might lead you to think that the drugs problem has disappeared. The French authorities however seem to have a different idea. More on that and the future of riders from the demoted teams Kelme and Domina Vacanze over at Velo News.

Pink Bike seem to have the first news of the story that SRAM look set to buy brake manufacturer Avid. Avid make some great kit and it’s going to be really interesting to see what SRAM can come up with as an alternative to Shimano kit. Read the full article here.

If there was any doubt that Enduro racing is the current big thing in mountain biking the following two links should change that perspective. Merida have taken over the reins held by Kona and have details of some epic riding coming up this year in Wales and a new 12 hour event, this time on the west coast. Meanwhile Singletrack are behind the British Cycling backed race series.

US firm Risse Racing have never gone away, it’s just that they don’t have such a big presence in the UK compared to some of the other shock manufacturers. The thing that surprised me is that they also do a range of replacement parts for bikes a la BETD, including this range of parts of Specialized bikes.

The Sexmidget has had a revelation (which you’ll need to read if what follows is to make sense) and has announced somewhat tongue in cheek that he’s going to stop smoking gear and getting pissed on beer and is going to take racing really seriously. Which is going to mean a start to training and slipping into some roady lycra.

Most fundamentally important he’s also developed a new philosophical epistemology, henceforth known as Postsinglespeedism and is encouraging the enlightened to loudly proclaim riser bars and anything but xc racing tyres as “shit and for gay wankers all the fucking time”.

I don’t know what the most worrying prospect is, but the ‘midget is obviously a genius.

After a lazy start to the day I managed to get my act together and made my way up to the West Ridings for a day in Last of the Summer Wine countryside. I parked up in Penistone and dropped down and then climbed up past Scout Dike Reservoir, from there I headed around to Gunthwaite Hall before tackling Heald Head and its two ford crossings and the woodland above Bentcliff Hall before dropping into Cawthorne.

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From the trail leading across towards Barnby Furnace, the sight of the M1 and Barnsley remind you that you’re not far from built up areas. The Silkstone Trail, a former waggonway, leads up to Silkstone, from where there seems to be a huge amount of climbing up past Blacke Dam for which you never seem to earn back.

The Transpennine Trail is joined just after the Railway bridge adjacent to Coates Great Wood and heads off towards Hull along a disused railway line. After a brief section on the A629, the route drops down over the spectacular Willow Bridge over the River Don. From there a bridleway trail crosses land heading towards Roughbirchworth, but is a section characterised by a staggering number of farm gates. It soon forgotten though as the trail drops back into Penistone.

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Not a particularly big route, but one that was probably ideal for a winter ride in wet and muddy conditions. It’s given me a taste of sections of the Transpennine Trail that I hadn’t ridden before and it’s again raised the prospect of riding the whole route, one day. For now I’m happy to read other peoples accounts.

Kelme and Domina Vacanze team have been dropped from this year’s cycling elite. Both teams had been threatened with being removed from the world’s top 30 for failing to meet International Cycling Union (UCI) rulings. Both Mario Cipolini’s Italian outfit and Vuelta d’Espana winners Kelme have been send down after failing to comply. They have until 15 January to meet the registration conditions to be a second-division squad. Roger Hammond’s Belgian Palmans Collstrop team and Spain’s Relax Bodysol benefited from the UCI’s decision and have been promoted to the top flight.

Canadian Dave Watson was announced winner of the Guardian Unlimited’s Sports Personality of the Year Award 2003, for his impressive Tour de France peloton jump in one of thois years mountain stages of the tour. Immediately after the jump, speculation regarding its authenticity was rife, but the release of MSP’s New World Disorder IV, Ride the Lightning, provided stunning evidence of a classic bit of freeriding. The third prize also went to a rider – Tour hardman, Tyler Hamilton.

Paola Pezzo has decided to return to the xc mountain bike scene in a bit to attempt to claim a thrid Olympic Gold medal. The decision was made during the World’s in Lugano, where she was a special guest and spectator. “I went to Lugano in September to see the World Championships. That’s where I told myself that I just couldn’t go to Athens to watch. The Olympics are possible, and I can do well. Nothing’s easy, but it wasn’t easy in Atlanta and Sydney either. It’s never easy.” More over at Dirt Rag.

Meanwhile some riders in California had an unexpected complication to a ride in the woods, when a mountain lion decided that one of them looked pretty tasty and tried to eat them. More here, but in all honesty, this story has been everywhere. What bandwagon?

I missed tonight’s Calderdale nightride. I’m a bit gutted, but I’ll get over it. This posting from mtbr.com, hints at the reason why people love night riding so much: “All I can say is a great ride with great friends really turned a bad day into a good one”. Read the full post here.

Long ago I used to frequent mtbr.com a lot more than I do now, it’s still a place to find fantastic photos like these and here stories from riders in different parts of the world. It shows just how the internet really does negate the geographical dstances between the mountain biking community.

This is the Finnish mountain biking forum that has generated a lot of traffic to rothar.com over the last few weeks. I don’t pretend to understand much of it, but there’s the occassional bit of English that’s recognisable.

And finally if you never read about any of Reed and Woody’s excellent adventures, they are still up here if you trawl through the postings.

The hardcore amongst us were out this morning. I was not. There’s a big difference between doing breakfast rides in summer compared to this time of year. The least of it is that I’d have another bike to clean or have dirty in the kitchen. The bigger issue is to do with getting up at 5 in the morning to go out and ride in the cold wet and dark south of Manchester.

There isn’t a winter Enduro race in Thetford this year, which is a shame because it’s a popular season starter. Fortunately local rider Slowjo has taken on responsibility for organising a bit of a ride in the woods anyway. There are details here and the provisional date is 9th May.

Barrie Clarke is a legend within the British mountain bike scene, probably best known for his over ten years service with the Raleigh team and numerous national championship titles. This is his website.

This news article brought a smile to my face. It’s good to see a small victory against the big companies. The current law on copyright is just not going to work.

Drink driving is just stupid. Stupid, like driving without wearing a seatbelt or whilst using a mobile phone. This is an example of the consequences, at least there was only damage to property, there could have been loss of life. What is it about Range Rover drivers?

I meant to add a link to this video in my last update. It’s a biggy, but the bike crash within caused much amusement to a shop full of customers at the weekend.

Following on from yesterday’s road news, rumours have been in cirulation for sometime, but Planet X have now confirmed that they will be forming a road racing team for the coming season based around Mark Lovatt, John Tanner and Kevin Dawson. The team will be supported by a small but tightly knit group of sponsors that will see them riding a new range of road bikes from On-One.

There is some great news for all of us in a recent report from MTB-Wales that heralds details of a new trail about to start construction that will encourage visitors to Betws-y-Coed to stay a bit longer:

Construction of a new mountain bike trail will soon begin in woodland at Penmachno close to Betws-y-Coed. The 32 km trail will cost £220,000 to build and should be finished in around 16 months. Click here for the full story.

Meanwhile Jon and the crew over at Just Riding Along have managed to get their mitts on one of the new Edge full sussers and have given it a write up. Click the link above to get the report and access a number of photos.