Mountain Bike Shenanigans

Meirhaeghe Positive
July 29th, 2004

Filip. What can I say? He has been a bad lad and I’m disappointed. I was thinking he was just having a good run of form, but it’s sad to see that’s because he’s been on the gear to get him on the top of the podium.

I didn’t know about the ’97 incident but I guess it must be hard to quit old habits. He did have a shocking sense of fashion though. Almost like the Mario Cipollini of the mountain bike world. More here and over at Mountain Bike Action.

Meanwhile once golden boy looks like he’s about to turn the tables. This could be one to watch: Disgraced world champion David Millar says he hopes he will be allowed to work with the cycling authorities to warn against the dangers of doping. More at the Beeb.

I have a submission date set. Four years of work is now rapidly approaching the 24 September. I am highly convinced that there will be less time for any shenanigans of any kind in the coming two months let alone the mountain biking variety, but we’ll see.

From: Katie
Subject: Proud to be British?

Be very proud to be British Because…

Only in Britain… can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in Britain… do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in Britain… do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke.
Only in Britain… do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
Only in Britain… do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Only in Britain… do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won’t miss a call from someone we didn’t want to talk to in the first place.
Only in Britain… are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.

Not to Mention:

3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.
31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.
19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.
British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.
101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.
18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control Scalextric cars.

And finally:

In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet

Finally, ladies, ladies! Handbags are being drawn stateside.

New Site
July 27th, 2004

Ooooh get me. It’s the new look of It’s almost glitzy and everything. Well unfortunately it’s only skin deep at the moment and there’s still plenty of shonky pages in the depths of the site.

I’ve plugged the RUSS Appeal in the past. So far they’ve raised a shed load of cash for the Air Ambulance, but they want to keep things rolling so the banner at the top of the page is going to be there for a little while. The Air Ambulances are good, they help lift broken MTBers like the Droid off hillsides. So I can say I know someone that’s been helped by them and maybe one day they’ll be the ones who get me or you out of a nasty situation too.

The government have recently issued a leaflet on steps the average person can take to prepare for a catastrophic terrorist attack. Not that they want to shit people up, or that they’re worried that if you bomb the crap out of far away countries that you might piss people off and that they’ll exact bloody revenge or anything. No, no. It’s all just in case. Well you might not know that there’s also a website to accompany this new campaign it’s scary stuff. I especially like the bit where it says:

If you are involved in any emergency it is important to:

  • Run like hell, particularly if you caused the emergency.
  • Trample all others in your desperate attempt to escape.
  • Loot on the way out

Damp Night Ride
July 22nd, 2004

Tuesday night was a bit of a damp night ride. I think it was actually hailing at one point, but despite being soaked through it was still warm enough to be out with short sleeves and shorts even once it was dark (just about). I think one of the best bits of singletrack in the northwest may have been ridden that night. It’s certainly the most fun I’ve had out on the bike for a while and I’ve the bruises to prove it.

Mark from Massachusetts dropped me an e-mail recently. He runs an online store offering plenty of gear for winter and summer sports activities, as well as adventure travel. Check out his shop at bbskis.

From: Anthony
Subject: Mountain Bikes Order

Dear Sir,

My name Anthony Chang from Singapore. I’m interested to buy from your store.
My order as follows:

– 2004 Intense Spider Mountain Bike-( Medium ), quantity: 4 units

Please let me know the total prices plus shipping by UPS to
Do you accept Visa/Mastercard payment?
I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Hmmm, now whatever you make of that (no, it couldn’t be a scam could it?) as I don’t have bikes for sales I couldn’t help, other than to recommend North West Mountain Bikes are the nearest Intense dealer I can think of.

What happens when you forget that arguably the best rider Tour rider in the Peloton used to be a renowned sprinter? When it comes to a small bunch sprint he’s going to spring something. Armstrong won again today. He is riding in a class of his own at the moment and his tactical and motivational command of the USPS team has earnt him the opportunity to seal a sith Tour victory.

Not Very Evil
July 19th, 2004

There is a lot of stuff to fit into this update because lots has been happening, but little of that has involved me riding a bike. Where to start? I suppose a good start is to bring an update on the feud. First a recap. Strike one. Strike two. Now strike three. Finally is it me or does this Tour rider look ever so slightly like some one we know? Well this site has been ratified:

This site is certified 40% EVIL by the Gematriculator

So that’s from the same people who brought you the mighty Rasterbator. Take a regular sized image and convert it into a monster poster/billboard sized photo. How ‘bo selecta is that?

Are these north shore riders talking about someone we know? No hang on… That’d be scottish, but born in england, with a welsh surname. I guess that still makes him a Limey in their books. Is he there yet? Reports are expected.

Now how’s this for novel. The more beer bottles you catch in the crate, the more clothes the ladies take off. Things start getting interesting about 8,000 points and I’m guessing are no longer work safe after about 10,000, but I haven’t made it that far.

Finally leaving tags by cleaning. A new wave in urban graffiti. Check this out.

Sleepless in the Saddle is rapidly approaching. I hope the weather improves. I can’t see it being much fun if it doesn’t. It’d certainly be a bit pants if it degenerated into SSMM type conditions. I suppose I shouldn’t contemplate that too much incase I curse our luck. I’m also waiting for a pair of forks to arrive, because if it’s muddy I’ll be riding the singlespeed it needs some.

Behind the scenes here at towers I’ve been working on version 3.0 of the site and I’m proud to announce that it’s now all done. Well the design is anyway. There’s a fair bit of content to rearrange and edit and such and I’m thinking of migrating over to phpWebsite with a new host. Not sure how long it’ll be before that’s ready though.

Finally, from recent performances, it looks like Lance has done a fair bit of training this season. US Postal are looking solid and his biggest threats are coming from riders, who were generally not heralded as being big contenders. Lets see what the Alps have on offer.

July 15th, 2004

Counter-strike from the East. And everything is all smiles.

The great thing about living up here in ‘the North’ is the class of some of the locals. I mean if you fall out with your mate you go home, get the shotty and go back to settle things. ‘cept you might not make it that far:

A South Yorkshire man who shot himself in the testicles with a shotgun has been jailed for five years. David Walker, 28, from The Crescent, Dinnington, had drunk 15 pints of lager when he accidentally discharged the gun which was stuffed down his trousers.

Genius. Absolute genius. Full story here.

People continue to doubt Lance Armstrong’s claims that he is not a doper. I think Lance is clean and that he’s justified to be pissed off with stuff like this happening. Name me one other sportsman at the top of his game who has come back from a life threatening illness. Lance was World Champion before his cancer treatment which changed him physically making him suited to a more rounded cyclist. He’s been to hell and back through the burning pain of chemotherapy and has emerged from the other side with a burning desire to win. So what you’ve got is some one that’s tough as boots and has everything to play for. I hope he win’s this years Tour.

Ummm, a team of female mountain bikers in an American-style Calendar. Yes, really – here.

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